The Douchebag At The Gym

New flash published today, about ridiculing a stranger online. A jolt between your jolts of espresso. In Postcard Shorts. 

Chief Wahoo Speaks

Chief Wahoo Speaks

Ooo! Ah! Ah!

(the tom­–tom beat)

Kill’m!

Slash’m!

Burn’m!

Rape!

Ooo! Ah! Ah!

(The blood–red beat)

Rape white women!

(boom boom boom)

Kill white children!

(boom boom boom)

Slash’m!

Kill’m!

Burn’m!

 Rape!

Wahoo! Wa!

(our ancient cry)

Wahoo kill!

(our savage cry)

Hi yi ya

(our ancient dance)

Hi ya ya

(our base hit dance!)

Kill `em!

Scalp `em!

Suck `em dry!

Drink red blood

of dead white man!

Hi ya! Hi!

Big game today!

Hi ya! Hi!

Turn double play!

Drink’m blood of dead white man!

Paint skin red with dead white man!

And now, savage Tribe of blood–red skin, hear Chief say—

Kill`m!

Slash’m!

Burn’m!

Rape!

And when done—

go beat`m A’s!

Grading Bad ... a Breaking Bad Riff

Breaking Bad fans, check out my Breaking Bad parody, "Grading Bad," in Hobart. How will Ms. L pay for Mittens' health care!!!

Fabulous Alyssa Moore illustration ...

Long I've wanted to be in Hobart. Well, I've had baseball haiku in there a couple of times, but this is my first story.

New Story in Zouch

So pleased to have "The Short, Happy Life of J. Alfred Macomber" published in Zouch. They have framed the story superbly! The dying tweets of a Twitter–sized life.

"The Next Big Thing" Interview—Jon Sindell/The Mighty Roman Baseball Blast

"The Next Big Thing" Interview: Jon Sindell

Hey cats, I’m participating in a fun little book–promotion experiment. I’m answering ten questions about my book, and including links to five authors who will in turn answer ten questions about their books and include links to five authors who will in turn answer ten questions about their books ... and round and round she goes.

I was invited to participate by Tracy DeBrincat, author of the fast, funny, fringe–of–Hollywood novel Hollywood Buckaroo. More about Tracy at the end of my interview.

Which is here ...

What is your working title of your book (or story)?

The non–“working” title of my novel is The Mighty Roman, which I call “non–working” because it doesn’t signal that this is a baseball novel. Error on the author. Though the cover by the amazing Chris Corwin clearly signals “baseball within.” Anyway, the title is about to be rejiggered as The Mighty Roman Baseball Blast, and Chris and I are collaborating on a cover redesign which will be awesome (I allow myself one “awesome” per conversation).

Where did the idea come from for the book?

I’ve always liked stories set in a closed system: the jury room, as in Twelve Angry Men, or on board a ship, as in Moby Dick, Lifeboat, or Mutiny On The Bounty. Characters in a closed system interact in an incredibly rich way over time, because they can’t escape one another. And a baseball team, such as the San Carlos Coyotes of the indie Cal–Hairy League, is such a closed system. And into this petri dish I placed a middle–aged white manager confused and angered by the disappearance of “his” America, and a multicultural group of eighteen–year–old ballplayers who tangibly represent the changing face of America. The book becomes sort of a Mutiny On The Bounty with bats (and pranks: it’s funny). Plus, I love baseball.

What genre does your book fall under?

Literary fiction, though as I market the book, I discover that it defies easy categorization. I, and some kind readers and reviewers consider it quite literary, but it is also a baseball story—thought it is not just a baseball story! (no frustration here). And it is a story about eighteen–year–olds, though I do not think it is a “young adult” novel per se.

Which actors would you choose to play your characters in a movie rendition?

Roman Meister, rambunctious, confused, angry white male manager:

Tom Berenger

Rex Hirsch, teen son of a Venice Beach hipster, dashing, undersized second baseman, defender of animals, friend of gays and people of all stripes, leader of rebellion against Roman:

Toby Maguire

Hammerhead Hirsch, boxing Beat poet “The Boardwalk Balladeer,” father of Rex:

Joe Mantegna

What is the one-sentence synopsis of your book?

Fast, funny, sometimes dark ride through the first and only most glorious season of the Cal–Hairy baseball league, or: Bull Durham meets Mutiny On The Bounty.

Will your book be self-published or represented by an agency?

I have self–published it, and I’m hopeful that it will be picked up by a press. I’ve had a lot of short stories published, and I’m hoping my stories will catch someone’s eye … somewhere … somehow … “There’s a place for us/Somewhere a place …”

How long did it take you to write the first draft of your manuscript?

Year–ish. The whole thing took about four years of on–and–off work.

What other books would you compare this story to within your genre?

Bull Durham and The Great American Novel for the humor, action, and fun, Platoon (a movie, I know) and Mutiny On The Bounty (film) for the rebellion against a powerful commander (sergeant, captain, manager).

Who or what inspired you to write this book?

Number one, I totally love baseball. Second, there’s something compelling in the story of middle–aged white men who feel increasingly alienated in a rapidly changing America. For the past many years we have seen that many of these men are unable to go with the flow and turn bitter and even violent as a result. I wanted to delve into the psyche of one such bruised, proud, wounded man.

What else about your book might pique the reader’s interest?

People who don’t owe me favors have given it great reviews. And it’s funny as hell (see “Everyone Loves Chocolate” excerpt for instance).

And here’s a link to the first author who’s agreed to play in the chain:

Tracy DeBrincat is the author of the fast, funny, fringe–of–Hollywood novel Hollywood Buckaroo, and she was nice enough to invite me into this daisy chain. There is nothing superficial about my recommendation of Tracy’s novel, for I found her. Not that she was hiding—her book is prominent—but I went out alone into the wilds of the Web and found her terrific book while trolling through countless authors (I can’t count). Her sizzling prose pulled me right in. And I invited her to read at my Rolling Writers series in San Francisco, and, glory be, she accepted. So check her out, buckaroo. Add fun fact: Tracy and I both appeared in the inaugural issue of New South (Georgia State University). Hello, Chris Bundy!

 

I'll add more authors to the chain later.

Jon

Holden Caulfield lovers, here's one for you.

If you've ever wanted to help Holden out in his conflicts with insufferable fools, this one's for you: "Commas in the Right Place," winner of the Dorsal contest in Doorknobs & Bodypaint No. 70.

Same issue selected my Great Expectations micro, "The Dickens Code," selected in the Tapas section.
I love those Doorknobs & Bodypaint folks.

Chris Bundy, "Baby You're A Rich Man, July 13

Great news! Chris Bundy, author of the cool and coolly illustrated Japan–based novel Baby You’re A Rich Man, will be rolling by Rolling Writers (Rolling–Out, 1722 Taraval, SF) on Saturday, July 13 to read, chat, sell, and sign. I’m incredibly excited about meeting Chris and hearing him read. Excerpts …. Hai!

Lit–Night Is Back

I've finally awakened from my long winter's nap to revive Lit–Night At Rolling–Out, as requested by ... several. The first 2013 event will be a free–form round–robin with no featured reader but many featured readers, if you know what I mean. 

Writers, this is a great oppo to test drive your stuff in front of a small but discerning audience. Or, bring something canonical to share—I may read A.E. Housman's wry spoof of Homer (the Greek, not Simpson) for the sake of a lover of classical Greek lit. So come for good food, friendship, and the pleasure of sharing tasty lit.

Deets:

Saturday, April 13, 7:00 p.m.

Rolling–Out café (excellent pastries): 1722 Taraval St. between 27th and 28th Avenues, San Francisco

Hope to see ya!

Jon

Featured Reading at Noe Valley Authors Fest March 23

Hello Friends. I'll be one of three featured readers at the Noe Valley Authors Festival, the culminating event of Word Week, on Saturday, March 23, 3:00, St. Philip’s Church Hall, 725 Diamond St. (between 24^th St. and Elizabeth), S.F. I’ll have a 45–minute slot built around The Mighty Roman, my novel about baseball and the modern American man, and in that time, I’ll read two or three scenes from the book, field audience questions and comments with my pitcher's mitt, and sell and sign the book at the souvenir stand. I'll really gonna kick it with a high–energy reading, and it would be so cool if you could come—and just as cool, and very much appreciated, if you'd pass the word among any friends into baseball, lit, and the intersection of the two. To see whether you might enjoy the book, if you haven’t read it already, check out the first chapter and reader reviews here, and listen to this audiobook of selected scenes from the book (with awesome “bed music” courtesy of Steven Kacsmar’s Phantom City!).

Yours in the love of baseball and literature, Jon